The settling-in period at nursery: a plan and communication with families

For a one- or two-year-old, starting nursery is the first big change of routine in their life. For their family, often, it is too: it is the first time they leave their child with people they barely know. The settling-in period exists so that step is gradual for both.

Nurseries that do it well do not improvise every September. They have a written plan, they explain it before they start, and they look after one thing above all: that the family knows what is happening while they are not there.

Before you start: the initial meeting

Settling in begins before the first day. A meeting with each family in June, or in the first days of September, lets you collect what the team needs to know:

• Sleep routines: when they sleep, for how long, how they fall asleep, and whether they use a dummy or a comfort object.
• Food: what they eat, which textures they tolerate, confirmed allergies and intolerances.
• Health: medication, medical instructions, and who to call if anything happens.
• People authorised to collect them, and contact numbers.
• What calms them: a song, a toy, a way of holding them.

That sheet should be available to everyone on the team who will look after the child, not only the key person. If it stays on a piece of paper in a folder, it is lost the first time someone covers.

Gradual hours, in writing

Most nurseries plan a timetable that grows day by day. An indicative example for a room of one- to two-year-olds:

• Days 1 and 2: one hour, with the family present for part of the time.
• Days 3 and 4: two hours, with a goodbye and without the family in the room.
• Days 5 to 7: half a morning, including the snack.
• Second week: a day with lunch and, once the child is settled, the nap.

It is not a recipe. Each child has their own pace, and the plan should be reviewed halfway through with the family. What does help is that the calendar is written down and that the family has it before the first day, so they can organise their work.

The family's role

The family is part of settling in, not a spectator. It is worth explaining from the start what is expected of them:

• Always say goodbye, even if the child cries. Leaving unseen creates more insecurity the next day.
• Short goodbyes that are always the same, with the same phrase and the same gesture.
• Being on time for collection during those days: arriving late to pick them up when they have only been there an hour weighs heavily.
• Letting the nursery know about any change at home that might have an effect: a bad night, a cold, a house move.

What to tell them each day (and what not to)

For many families, the hardest part comes after the goodbye: the following hours with no news. Thoughtful communication reduces anxiety and phone calls to the nursery:

• A short message mid-morning in the first days: "She has settled now, playing with the blocks". Specific, not generic.
• The day's record: what they have eaten, whether they have slept and for how long, nappy changes, and how their mood has been. With a digital diary this is noted in seconds and the family sees it straight away.
• The occasional photo, provided the family has given consent and through a private channel of the centre, never through messaging groups.
• An honest account at collection: if they have cried a lot, say so with care and explain what was done. Families notice quickly when the day is being dressed up.

What is worth avoiding is overload: ten notifications in one morning create more unease than calm. A mid-morning message and the full record at the end are usually enough.

Organising the team for September

The first weeks need more hands than the rest of the year. Some nurseries stagger the arrival of new children by day so that each educator receives only a few at a time, and they reinforce the rooms of the youngest with support staff.

It is also worth deciding in advance who replies to families during the morning. If every educator is in the room, the family needs to know that someone in leadership or the office will see their message, and within what time.

How to know if settling in is going well

Beyond crying at goodbye, there are signs that the child is settling:

• They let the educators comfort them.
• They eat and sleep at nursery, even if less than at home.
• They explore the room and take an interest in other children or in the toys.
• The goodbye gets shorter each time.

If these signs have not appeared after two or three weeks, a meeting with the family is worth having to adjust the plan: fewer hours for a few more days, another key person, or a change in the arrival routine.

The paperwork, settled before day one

Settling in is much calmer when administration does not interrupt it. Before you start, each family should have enrolment, the direct-debit mandate, image and collection authorisations, and the terms for September's fees closed. If the nursery has subsidised places, also check how settling-in days are counted; we explain it in free childcare for ages 0-3 and subsidised places.

Conclusion

A good settling-in period shows in the child, but it is decided in the family: if they trust the nursery from the first week, the rest of the year is much easier. A written plan, clear goodbyes, and specific news during the day are the three things that help most.

If you want to see how a digital diary for nurseries works, with meals, naps, and photos that reach each family, see Edena for nurseries or book a demo.